FORGIVENESS

Forgiveness is not an easy choice, but we all make mistakes and need forgiveness at some point; therefore, it makes sense that we should forgive others, too. Sometimes it takes time to forgive someone fully. Sometimes we need to forgive numerous times, whether it’s over one major incident or multiple minor incidents. “Seven times seventy times” (Matthew 18:21-22)

Unforgiveness and resentment can tear apart families, friendships, relationships, work environments, and communities. Learning to forgive and let go of hurt and pain can help everyone move forward and help us as individuals to live a life free from bitterness, resentment, and some ongoing unnecessary pain. This doesn’t mean we validate people who wrong us, and sometimes things need to be dealt with directly and promptly.  Sometimes, under the law, justice may be invoked if there is abuse or a risk of harm. However, if we hold onto unforgiveness, it can brew into all sorts of trouble and manifest in various ways in the short and long term, including anger or deep sorrow. It can also have other negative impacts on our overall health and wellness.

For some people, it’s harder to forgive ourselves than to forgive others.

For me, taking it to the Lord in prayer and confiding in someone trustworthy is crucial to being able to live without bitterness and resentment brewing from not forgiving others, or any self-loathing from not forgiving myself. I know I have made some poor choices in my life, and I believe God has forgiven me. Therefore, I want to extend that forgiveness to others and to learn to forgive myself.

How about you? Obviously, we also need to ask for forgiveness from others at times, acknowledging that we have wronged them or, at the very least, understanding that we have done something that deeply upset them, and show compassion by empathizing with them. This is part of emotional intelligence. Sometimes, we are oblivious to when we have wronged someone. Jesus said while being nailed to the cross, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” I can’t imagine a greater act of forgiveness, agape love, and mercy in his willing sacrifice, even for some of those who crucified him, not knowing what they were really doing! Some of them even put their faith in Him and were saved from destruction, entering eternal life.

Something else to consider is that an eye for an eye makes the world go blind. We all need mercy, grace, and forgiveness at times, no matter how good and kind we might think we are.

If anyone has experienced harm or risk of harm, please get in touch with someone you trust ASAP or report it to the police, or reach out through helplines like these in Australia HERE.